T'was The Night, A Tale of Two Endings
by Lady Tee68
Summary: John tells the crew a Christmas story...or tries to.


Summary: The crew of Moya, having heard of some of John's earth traditions regarding Christmas, sat around in the center chamber awaiting a tale from his childhood.  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing but the fic. T'was The Night Before Christmas belongs to some guy with three names from way back in the day and Farscape Belongs to Kemper, O'Bannon, Henson and all those guys. Also the SciFi Channel, Channel Nine Australia. No copyright infringement is intended.  
  
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"Now I wrote this from memory in my notebook but I may have forgotten a thing or two about it but it goes a little something like this." John started.  
  
"T'was the night before Christmas when all through the house. Not a creature was stirring not even a mouse..."  
  
"Wait, what is a mouse?" Chiana asked sitting on the floor in front of John.  
  
"A rodent. Small. Sorta like Sparky except a hundred times smaller." John answered "Ok, where was I? Oh yeah. "The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, in hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there..."  
  
"Crichton?" Said D'Argo in a calm demeanor.  
  
"Yeah D'Argo?"  
  
"Three words...stockings, chimney, and St. Nicholas?" D'Argo questioned.  
  
"Ok, I see this story is going to take longer than it should. Ok, stockings are sorta like socks. On earth, we decorate them and hang them by the chimney so on Christmas morning when we wake up, they're filled with lots of goodies, candy and what not." John started.  
  
"A chimney is where the smoke comes out of after lighting a fire in the fireplace. By the way, a fireplace can be very romantic when lit and you have a beautiful woman snuggling up next too you to keep you warm." John said staring seductively at Aeryn.  
  
"Get on the with story John." Aeryn said trying to conceal her smile.  
  
"All right, are we clear as to what stockings are and a chimney is?" Asked John trying to continue the story.  
  
"John, you still haven't told us who this St. Nicholas is. Is he a priest?" Asked Zhaan.  
  
"No. St. Nicholas, or St. Nick for short, is Santa Claus. He's a big fat jolly guy who wears a red suit and hat. He travels in a sleigh pulled by eight reindeer. He goes from rooftop to rooftop sliding down everyone's chimney and putting presents under the Christmas trees. Ok, now can I finish?" He said all in one breath.  
  
"Stop John. This story makes no sense whatsoever." Said Aeryn harshly. "Why would anyone go around breaking into people's houses and leaving them prezzents under some kind of tree and then leaving again. And what the frell is a reindeer?"  
  
"Ok enough of the questions already. Can I please get through the story before you guys bombard me with the questions? Please?" John demanded as all eyes were fixed on him.  
  
"Crichton's right. We should let him finish before we try and find out what this story is about." Zhaan said in her usual calming manor. "Even if it doesn't make sense." She said barely above a whisper.  
  
"It's a kids story and it's not supposed to make sense. It's supposed to make kids happy and feel good about Christmas. Geez. Now let me finish." John said annoyed by the interruptions.  
  
"Humph. I say it's more frelling human nonsense." Mumbled Rygel.  
  
"I agree with Rygel. This in nothing more than human nonsense told to naive children so they can grow up talking and teaching more human nonsense." Jool chimed in.  
  
"Sparky! Jool!" John shouted. "You guys are gonna make me lose my place. All right now, where was I?" John asked trying to remember.  
  
"You said something about stockings and a jolly fat guy." answered Chiana.  
  
"Thanks Chi. The only one around here being nice to me and keeping their mouths shut." John smiled lovingly at Chiana and patted her on the head and then glared around the room at the others.  
  
"Stockings, chimney, oh...in hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there. The children were nestled all snug in their beds while visions of sugar plums danced in their heads..."  
  
"Sounds more like Crichton's having visions of Scorpius in his head." Rygel whispered under his breath.  
  
"I heard that buckwheat." John said looking up from his notebook to stare daggers at Rygel.  
  
"What? What did I say?" He said trying to sound innocent.  
  
"And mamma in her kerchief and me in my cap, had just settled down for a long winters nap..." John continued. "When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter, I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter. Away to the window I flew like a flash, tore open the shutters and threw up the sash. The moon on the breast of new fallen snow gave luster of mid day to objects below..."  
  
Just then they all heard snoring coming from the back of the room. John looked up to see D'Argo asleep with his head tilted back and Jool resting her head on his shoulder also asleep. The rest of the crew turned around to witness the sight. "How rude." John said as he picked up the nearest object and tossed it towards D'Argo hitting him square in the stomach.  
  
"Huh? What happened? Good story Crichton. Please tell us another one of your Crizmas stories." D'Argo said jumping up and clapping as Jool fell to the floor.  
  
"I'm not finished with this story yet D'Argo." John said annoyed and hurt by the behavior of his crewmates. "You know what, if there's anyone here not interested in this, feel free to leave. I just thought it'd be nice to share a little quality time together. I don't know how you guys feel, but you're family to me and I care about all of you. I know that I sometimes make no sense and it annoys you but you're the only family I have and it doesn't hurt any less to be ridiculed." John finished and stared at each of his so-called friends. "Look, do you want to hear this or not?" He asked sadly.  
  
"I wanna hear it." Chiana begged. "Please. Forget them. You can just tell it to me if you want." She said crawling closer to sit beside John.  
  
"Thanks Pip. It really means a lot." John said putting his arm around her.  
  
"Please finish John. I'd really like to hear it." Aeryn said sitting next to him and taking him by the hand. "Go on." She smiled at him. When everyone seemed to be in agreement John continued the story.  
  
"When, what to my wondering eyes should appear, but a miniature sleigh and eight tiny reindeer..."  
  
"Ooo, this is where the reindeer come in." Said Chiana excitedly. John smiled down at her.  
  
"With a little old driver so lively and quick, I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick. More rapid than eagles his coursers they came and he whistled and shouted and called them by name...  
  
"Now Dasher! Now Dancer! Now Prancer and Vixen! On Comet! On Cupid! On Doner and Blitzen!"  
  
"Those sure are some funny names." Chiana interrupted again.  
  
"Pip!" John said as he put his finger to his lips to quiet her.  
  
"Oops sorry." She quieted.  
  
"To the top of the porch! To the top of the wall! Now dash away! Dash away! Dash away all!  
  
"As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly, when they meet with an obstacle mount to the sky. So up to the house top the coursers they flew, with the sleigh full of toys and St. Nicholas too..."  
  
Aeryn, still holding John's hand, yawned and rested her head against John's shoulder. She intertwined her fingers with his. He stopped reading for a moment to look at her and smiled as a warm feeling shot through him. He continued...  
  
"And then in a twinkling I heard on the roof the prancing and pawing of each little hoof. As I drew my hand and was turning around, down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound. He was dressed all in fur from his head to his foot and clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot. A bundle of toys he had flung on his back, and he looked like a peddler just opening his pack..."  
  
"Now this is where I explain what Santa looks like." John said.  
  
"His eyes--how they twinkled, his dimples how merry. His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry. His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow and the beard of his chin was as white as the snow..."  
  
"Sounds like you D'Argo." Interrupted Aeryn. "All we need is to dye your beard white."  
  
"Yeah and Rygel could pull your sleigh." Giggle Chiana.  
  
"I can't see that little toad pulling anything. Or should I say rodent." Jool said putting in her two cents. Everybody let out a hardy laugh.  
  
"Wait, How The Grinch Stole Christmas. We have the perfect cast. D'Argo and Rygel." John added. "I can see it now. Paint D'Argo green and put little antlers on Rygel. How The D'Argo Stole Christmas. It's perfect." John almost fell out of his seat laughing but D'Argo didn't look the least bit amused. "Sorry big guy. I couldn't pass that one up. Ok, let's finish this story already." He continued.  
  
"The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth and the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath..."That's a little round doo-hickey made of branches of a pine.oh never mind. I'll tell ya later." John explained.  
  
"He had a broad face and a little round belly that shook when he laughed like a bowlful of jelly. He was chubby and plump and right jolly old elf and I laughed when I saw him in spite of myself. A wink of his eye and a twist of his head soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread. He spoke not a word but went straight to his work, and filled all the stockings then turned with a jerk. And laying his finger aside of his nose, he sprang to his sleigh to his team gave a whistle and away they all flew like the down of a thistle. But I heard him exclaim ere he drove out of sight, Merry Christmas to all and to al a goodnight."  
  
When he finished he looked around at his crewmates who looked either glad that he had finished or tired from such a long night. "Well, that's it. Did you enjoy it? No, don't answer that. I can tell by your overwhelming enthusiasm that you did." He said sarcastically. "Thanks for the standing ovation."  
  
"Crichton, that was very very titillating. Promise me that you'll tell us another one next cycle when your Crizmas comes along." D'Argo quipped as he stood up and stretched. "If anybody needs me, I'll be in my quarters sleeping for the next 50 arns." He said as he left.  
  
"Thanks big guy. You're a great ego booster." John replied. "Ok, anybody up for another one?"  
  
"NO!" They all answered in unison.  
  
"Ok ok. No need to get hostile." John said as he got up and stretched his own legs. "You know something, I've never heard any of your childhood stories. Let's hear it. Anyone have any stories they want to share?" He asked.  
  
"NO Crichton!" They said again in unison.  
  
"All right all right. You're all free to go." He said shooing them towards the door.  
  
Zhaan, Rygel and Jool all left the center chamber leaving John, Chiana and Aeryn.  
  
"I thought that was a great story. You sounded like you had a fun childhood old man." Said Chiana. "Can you tell me another one?"  
  
"Maybe tomorrow Pip." Said John as he kissed Chiana on the cheek. "G'night."  
  
"Goodnight." She replied and she too left the center chamber.  
  
Ending One:  
  
After everyone had left he turned to face Aeryn. "Can I walk you home?" He asked, offering his hand to her. She looked at him questioningly but accepted it and stood up walking next to him. They walked hand and hand down the corridor in silence.  
  
"Pretty silly if you think about it huh?" John asked breaking the silence.  
  
"What? The story? No. It was...nice." She answered trying to make him feel good even though it had been confusing for her.  
  
"C'mon Aeryn. You don't have to lie." He said. "It's just a made up story to excite children. My mom used to read it to my sisters and me every Christmas eve. I kinda miss it ya know?" He finished looking sadly at her.  
  
"What do you miss most John?" Aeryn asked.  
  
"Everything. Christmas, snow, decorating, presents." He paused. "My mom and dad, my sisters, my best friend DK." He answered sadly.  
  
"I'm sorry John." Aeryn stopped walking and faced him. "I'm sorry for laughing at all of this. Thinking it was a silly earth thing. I see that it really meant a lot for you to read that story to us and all we did was make fun of you." She looked deeply into his eyes. "I'm very sorry."  
  
"It's ok. I guess it is kind of silly when you're an adult let alone an adult in the uncharted territories." He responded.  
  
As they reached Aeryn's quarters, John pulled something out of his pocket. "What is that?" She inquired.  
  
"Mistletoe." John replied with a big grin.  
  
"Missile toe?" Aeryn asked, as she again became confused.  
  
"Well not exactly. I got it from Zhaan's apothecary. It kind of looks like mistletoe." He answered.  
  
"Is this another crizmas thing?"  
  
"Yep. And it's tradition that when two people stand underneath it, as we are doing at this very moment..." He said trapping Aeryn against Moya's bulkhead with one hand and raising the decoration over their heads with the other. "You have to kiss." He finished as he closed his eyes, puckered his lips and leaned closer to Aeryn.  
  
"Tradition huh?" She asked.  
  
"Mmm-mm tradition. Now kiss me." He demanded with his eyes still closed.  
  
"Is that an order?"  
  
"C'mon Aer..." He started again as he was nailed with a big juicy kiss from her. A kiss so great he felt weak in the knees. "Whoa. Now that's...that's good. God Aeryn, you have to warn a guy before you do that." He said still trying to grasp his bearings.  
  
"Well you said it was tradition John and far be it for me to deny you your traditions." She replied as she palmed open the door to her quarters and gave him one last kiss. "Merry Christmas John."  
  
"Merry Christmas Aeryn." He said. With mistletoe still in hand, he could not help but smile as he turned to leave. 'Now that's a present I would love to wake up to every Christmas,' he thought to himself smiling as he walked happily down the corridor towards his quarters.  
  
The End  
  
Ending Two:  
  
After everyone had left he turned to face Aeryn. "Can I walk you home?" He asked, offering his hand to her. She looked at him questioningly but accepted it and stood up walking next to him. They walked hand and hand down the corridor in silence.  
  
"Pretty silly if you think about it huh?" John asked breaking the silence.  
  
"What? The story? No. It was...nice." She answered trying to make him feel good even though it had been confusing for her.  
  
"C'mon Aeryn. You don't have to lie." He said. "It's just a made up story to excite children. My mom used to read it to my sisters and me every Christmas eve. I kinda miss it ya know?" He finished looking sadly at her.  
  
"What do you miss most John?" Aeryn asked.  
  
"Everything. Christmas, snow, decorating, presents." He paused. "My mom and dad, my sisters, my best friend DK." He answered sadly.  
  
"I'm sorry John." Aeryn stopped walking and faced him. "I'm sorry for laughing at all of this. Thinking it was a silly earth thing. I see that it really meant a lot for you to read that story to us and all we did was make fun of you." She looked deeply into his eyes. "I'm very sorry."  
  
"It's ok. I guess it is kind of silly when you're an adult let alone an adult from the uncharted territories." He responded.  
  
"I guess we have to have something to tell our children your next Christmas eve." Aeryn said nonchalantly.  
  
John stopped dead in his tracks and suddenly began to feel dizzy. "Wha...what did you just say?" He managed to ask after the dizziness past.  
  
"Well our child anyway." Aeryn smiled at him. "Merry Christmas John."  
  
After registering what Aeryn had told him, John leaned against Moya's bulkhead. He slid down into a sitting position holding his head for what seemed like forever to Aeryn. She began to feel concerned.  
  
She walked over and knelt in front of him taking his head between her hands. She lifted his head up to face him. "John, are you not happy?" She asked concerned. She could see the tears that had began to well up in his eyes.  
  
"Am I not happy? Aeryn, do you have any idea what this means to me?" He asked. "This is the most wonderful Christmas present anyone could ask for." He replied taking her by the hands and squeezing them. "I am so happy right now, Aeryn, that I...I don't what to say."  
  
Aeryn moved to sit next to him putting an arm around him. "I'm glad you're happy. I didn't know how I was going to tell you. Now seemed to be the appropriate time."  
  
John looked into her eyes as if he were seeing her for the first time. "I love you Aeryn. So much." He said embracing her with all the love and emotion that he never felt with any woman.  
  
"I love you too." She responded as she tightened her grasp around his waist.  
  
They cherished the comfort of each other's warmness for a few more microts before getting up and heading towards quarters. They walked hand and hand in silence as they reached Aeryn's quarters.  
  
"John, will you stay with me tonight?" Aeryn asked as John palmed open her door.  
  
"Of course. There's nothing I wouldn't do for you." He stopped and turned to face her. "From here on in, Aeryn, I'm here for you and our baby...always."  
  
"I guess it's time to start our own traditions huh?" She asked. "Are there any more Christmas stories like the one you told us?"  
  
"Oh you don't know the half of them baby." He answered. "I can't wait to tell you and the others about Rudolph."  
  
"Rudolph? Is this going to be a long story?" Aeryn asked exhausted.  
  
"See what happened was there was this reindeer with a big ole red nose who pulled Santa's sleigh and..." John started as Aeryn shook her head.  
  
'Me and my big mouth,' she thought to herself. 'It's going to be a long night.'  
  
The End  
  
End Note: The second part was written because for some reason I've been on this Aeryn pregnancy kick. I really don't know where it's coming from. I actually thought of this ending first but then changed it because not everybody likes the idea of Aeryn becoming pregnant but hey, it's just fanfic right? It's pretty sappy and shippy but I am a huge shipper for John and Aeryn. So sue me. Anyway, I hoped you enjoyed the fic and both endings. Happy Holidays. Love Lady T. 


End file.
